Let me begin with a very renowned quote on secrecy by none other than Sir John F. Kennedy,

“The very word ‘Secrecy’ is repugnant is a free and open society”.

And I’m sure, no one more than. John F. Kennedy wanted a liberal and transparent and peaceful society. Well, that might be the reason of his assassination.

But this post isn’t about who killed whom and why. It’s what I recently came across. I might be wrong at my thinking about it. But yeah, I won’t hesitate to put up my thought behind it.

I’m just a new kid on the block. A new lad in this writing realm. Yet, I’m old enough to make out what I observe. After all, writers are born only when there is a need to say the stuff that is unsaid.

Particularly, I created this blog when my Ex-girlfriend forced me to. She herself being a celebrity of the blogger domain, insisted me to join her. Being in a relationship I had no choice. But before creating this blog, busily she glimpsed me with her stellar creation. She was obsessed.

And that’s where the first time I saw the squirm. Her blog name was fake. The display photo was obviously not hers. And the posts she used to publish weren’t her real embodiment. No doubt, she had a colossal list of followers. But what’s the point here?

There is a fun in having a secret or just living with a mystery. In her own head, she was the queen. Because thousands of people used to thump the like button on her every post. Her posts were eloquent, that’s why the mob was following her.

But in real life, she was totally opposite. Not everyone knew that the maniac behind that blog was her. Here, I’m not criticizing her or judging her, but the end result of it was brutal. No, the breakup didn’t occur because of it. Because of all that, she was excelling the path of duality.


The point of having a peaceful life is to transcend the dualities, and instead, she was becoming comfortable with them. Her hours without being active on the blog were all fruitless. Our relationship eventually sank. And her bond with everyone also reached a somber state.

The frenetic attention that she got because of her fallacy only seemed to be an exultation, but deep down she was becoming hollow. And she ended up herself in a hospital.

There is a sure chance that there might be some other reasons for the doom. But not to be a rogue here, I felt like we all need to get the basics clear. Because of living a dual life, her relation with her own self-touched the lowest possible speck.

When all this happened, one of her best friends confronted me and wanted to know the reason of her morbid state. Whatever I felt being with her I told her. But she wasn’t able to digest any of it. Because she had that this misconception in mind that being the best friend of my girlfriend, there won’t be any secrecy between the two.

Sometimes, we are not able to accept the truth. Because we have been trained to overlook it. From our parents, teachers, education system, society, authority, everyone is a living a secret life.

BUT, what’s the use? If we are not able to make anything good out of it, then why do we continue to keep walking on that track.

We tend to lose the people who hide even a small talk from us because we feel that the other isn’t loyal and trustworthy. Then why do we keep ourselves surrounded with same old bullshit about ourselves which in reality is a big lie? Why?

I think this is the high point to answer the why. And if not, then it’s the time to burn down those shackles.

One of my friends took it wrong. Having a private life is totally different from having a secrecy.

Secrecy brings stress while privacy brings happiness.

Being an introvert is different from living a faulty life.

Being honest should be on the cards on the time. Once you start being honest to yourself, it develops a chain and soon becomes a legacy.

The end note here would be from Robin Sharma, “Be honest. Every time. Because, every time you fail to do the right thing, you fuel the habit the doing the wrong thing.”

Drop the cloak of secrecy. Be careful who or what you pretend to be. You might lose your real self.

As an anonymous says, “secrecy is the beginning of tyranny”.

— raman thukral


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